Julie Stuckmeyer

Hot Mess

Excuses To Use When Caught Sleeping At Work 1. They told me at the blood bank that this might happen. 2. This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to. 3. I was working smarter - not harder. 4. Whew! I must have left the top off the whiteout. 5. I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm! 6. This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people! 7. I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance. 8. I'm in the management training program. 9. I'm actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP). I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend. 10. This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work! 11. I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress. Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga? 12. No! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem. 13. The coffee machine is broken.... 14. Someone must have put decaf in the wrong pot. 15. Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off. 16. Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic! 17. I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands. 18. The mail courier flipped out and pulled a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot. 19. Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day. 20. I'm just resting my eyes.