Janine, Mayor of Janinyville |
|||||||||||||
| This city was founded 4558 years, 4 months and 27 days ago! | |||||||||||||
JaninyvilleMayor
Janine
United States
Humanitarian
Interact
City Stats
| |||||||||||||
City Details
To view full city details Login / Join |
|||||||||||||
The Janinyville Wall
Charie D. La Marr, mayor ofPersiphoniaover 15 years agoFore! Today, we held our annual Corporate Golf Tournament for charity. Most of the several hundred tycoons in Persiphonia played. It cost them 5,000 dollars to play in a foursome with two D list celebrities. Many of our rock stars participated as well as many celebrities that we brought in just for the occasion. It was a great day, well it was a day anyway. But I did learn something about tycoons. For a crappy trophy that cost less than a hundred bucks, a crummy red jacket that looks like something the waiters at the Russian Tea Room would turn their noses up and bragging rights at the Golf Club, these guys would do anything! Is it any wonder they are hitting up the government for bailouts? Can they run their companies any more honestly than they can play a round of gold? I doubt it. I saw balls kicked from underneath trees to better positions when they thought nobody was looking. I saw numbers changed on scorecards. I saw caddies bribed. It was amazing what these guys thought they could get away with. But as long as they put up their 5 thousand dollars, who really cared who won? It was just another day at the golf course. In the end, the team of Marcus Waterbury, President of Blackstar Industries and Jackson Perkins, CEO of Perkins, Inc. won with a foursome that included Carrottop and OJ Simpson’s son playing in place of his incarcerated father. I doubt Carrottop or the young Simpson had ever held a golf club in their hands in their entire lives. And yet, they beat their nearest competition by nearly 20 strokes. Hmm. Personally, I think the two celebrities spent more time in the woods smoking marijuana than they did on the golf course. Honestly, it killed me to put those red jackets on those two idiots Marcus and Jackson, but if you can believe their scorecards, they won. In fact, each of them registered a hole in one. Quite unusual for Saturday morning golfers. I learned something about our tycoons this weekend. If you took their combined IQ, I think they would have a hard time passing the IQ of our village idiot. They are just morons who hire smart people to work for them and make them look good. They are also a bunch of letches. I was hit on repeatedly by tycoons who told me that sob story about wives who aren’t interested in sex anymore and who don’t care if their rich hubbies fool around. Let me tell you—most of these guys couldn’t complete a pass if they were Brett Favre. But to be honest, if I was married to one of them, I would rather have the credit cards than the sex any day. They are pigs—all of them. And yet, there were plenty of young gold digging tycoon groupies hanging around—girls who had about as much knowledge of golf as a doorknocker. And about as much intelligence. In the clubhouse afterwards, they hung all over these Masters of the Universe, hoping to have their rent paid for the next year or maybe pick up a new set of wheels in the bargain. They, too, have IQ’s less than our village idiot’s, so they should get along fine with our tycoons. I think next year, we should have the corporation put up the entry fee, but have the mail clerks compete instead of the tycoons. It would be a much more interesting and honest game. Watching these total boobs try to cheat was just hilarious. At least we made almost half a million dollars for the Boys and Girls Club. Assuming all their checks clear, which is questionable. I am passing some of these D List celebrities we rounded up along to you. They seem to think that playing in this tournament entitles them to a couple weeks at one of our finest establishment, with Persiphonia picking up the entire check. Well, the tournament is over. They can move on to some other event. Gary Coleman is especially rude. He thinks we should pick up the bills for his dry cleaning, and 5 new pairs of golf shoes since the ones he has got muddy. And he expected a couple new cars for his train collection. What you talkin’ about Willis? Not happening. For entertainment, we are sending you copies of Caddyshack and Happy Gilmore. It should make a great golf related double feature for your local drive in. Enjoy! Please remember to POP or Entertain us back often when you see us down. We have reached 1000 connections, but I am checking now and deleting those who do not autopop daily, so wait about a week and ask us again. I will ONLY connect to cities who send a friend request that contains the NAME OF THEIR CITY- not just ‘Metroâ€. All other requests will be deleted. I have already deleted over 150 names and replaced them and continue to do so a little at a time. I intend to give preference to people who have loyally popped Persiphonia though they were non-connections. We autopop every night at midnight or whenever we remember to. AND NOW FOR THE LATEST NEWS … Tales of Persiphonia is now online! I am in the process of adding all of the tales from way back in the beginning, along with my personal tips for playing the game and other cool Persiphonia stuff. You can find us at http://persiphonia.wordpress.com/ Drop by often. Leave comments. We love to hear from you! I am almost up to date adding the old ones to the blog. Sincerely yours, Persiphone Hellecat, Mayor, Empress, Queen and Exaulted Grand Poobah of Persiphonia, Land of the Free and Home of the Bipolar. (We have an excellent medical plan that includes prescriptions!) A PROUD NO NUKES CITY!!! We are now SOLAR!!! Let the sun shine in! 
2 Posts Available
New posts will cause posts older than 7 days to be deleted.
| |||||||||||||
|
Server time - 15:27
Copyright © 2024 Flair Balloon
|
|